18 by "Weird Al" Yankovic

A polka and parody-free collection of my favorite "Weird Al" songs:

1. Happy Birthday
2. I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead
3. Mr.Popeil
4. Midnight Star
5. Dare to be Stupid
6. One More Minute
7. Christmas At Ground Zero
8. You Make Me
9. Melanie
10. Generic Blues
11. UHF
12. Airline Amy
13. You Don't Love Me Anymore
14. Frank's 2000" TV
15. Since You've Been Gone
16. Everything You Know Is Wrong
17. Don't Download this Song
18. Skipper Dan

Madonna's Celebration Done Right

A career-spanning Madonna compilation should be a home run, but Madonna's recent Celebration whiffed it. For one, it wasn't in chronological order. For another, there were some curious choices. Here's a corrected version:

Disc 1
1. Everybody
2. Lucky Star
3. Borderline
4. Holiday
5. Material Girl
6. Like a Virgin
7. Dress You Up
8. Crazy For You
9. Into the Groove
10. Papa Don't Preach
11. Open Your Heart
12. Live To Tell
13. La Isla Bonita
14. Causing a Commotion
15. Like a Prayer
16. Express Yourself
17. Cherish
18. Vogue

Disc 2
1. This Used To Be My Playground
2. Deeper and Deeper
3. Rain
4. I'll Remember
5. Secret
6. Take a Bow
7. You'll See
8. Frozen
9. Ray of Light
10. Nothing Really Matters
11. The Power of Goodbye
12. Music
13. Don't Tell Me
14. What It Feels Like For a Girl
15. Hung Up
16. Sorry
17. 4 Minutes
18. Celebration

The 3:49 Club

All of these songs have a running time of 3:49 (according to iTunes)

• Ryan Adams - "City Rain, City Streets"
• Ryan Adams - "New York, New York"
• Christina Aguilara - "Cruz"
  
• Alkaline Trio - "Settle For Satin"
• Barenaked Ladies - "Take It Outside"
• Barenaked Ladies - "What A Letdown"
  
• Beastie Boys - "Song For Junior"
• The Beatles - "Across The Universe"
• Belle And Sebastian - "I'm Waking Up To Us"
• Big Star - "Daisy Glaze"
  
• Blur - "She's So High"
• Blur - "When The Clouds Come Home"
  
• BR549 - "Movin' The Country"
• Candy Butchers - "What To Do With Michael"
  
• Camera Obscura - "Lloyd, I'm Ready To Be Heartbroken"
  
• Mariah Carey - "Love Takes Time"
• Kim Carnes - "Bette Davis Eyes"
• Cheap Trick - "Can't Stop Falling Into Love"
  
• Chicago - "Stay The Night"
• Kelly Clarkson - "A Moment Like This"
• The Clash - "Clampdown"
• The Clash - "Clash City Rockers"
  
• The Click Five - "I'll Take My Chances"
• Collective Soul - "Love Lifted Me"
  
• Collective Soul - "Not The One"
  
• The Concretes - "Song For The Songs"
• Elvis Costello - "Little Palaces"
  
• Crash Test Dummies - "Swimming In Your Ocean"
• Crowded House - "Locked Out" (Live Version)
  
• The Dandy Warhols - "Insincere"
  
• Damone - "Out Of My Way"
• Death Cab For Cutie - "Pictures In An Exhibition"
• The Decemberists - "O Valencia"
  
• Depeche Mode - "Suffer Well"
• Dixie Chicks - "Hello Mr. Heartache"
• The Dukes Of Stratosphear - "My Love Explodes"
• Electric Light Orchestra - "Sweet Talkin' Woman"
• Eminem - "Who Knew"
  
• Erasure - "Breathe"
• Eve feat. Gwen Stefani - "Let Me Blow Ya Mind"
• Everclear - "Now That It's Over"
• Everclear - "My Sexual Life"
• Fall Out Boy - "Sugar We're Goin Down"
• Jason Faulkner - "I Go Astray"
• Feist - "Secret Heart"
  
• Foo Fighters - "Generator"
• Foo Fighters - "Virginia Moon"
  
• Ben Folds - "Carrying Cathy"
• Ben Folds - "Fired"
  
• Franz Ferdinand - "Jaqueline"
• Michael Frenti & Spearhead - "Tolerance"
  
• G Love & Special Sauce - "I-76"
• G Love & Special Sauce - "Soda Pop"
• Marvin Gaye - "Trouble Man"
• Genesis - "Turn It On Again"
• Vince Gill - "Blue Christmas"
  
• Nina Gordon - "Too Slow To Ride"
  
• George Harrison - "This Is Love"
  
• Hieruspecs - "I'm Behind You"
• Hem - "Lucky"
• Jay-Z - "The Ruler's Back"
  
• Jayhawks - "Smile"
• Mason Jennings - "Stars Shine Quietly"
• Jellyfish - "Glutton Of Sympathy"
• Jimmy Eat World - "Cautioners" (EP Version)
  
• Jimmy Eat World - "Lucky Denver Mint"
• Elton John - "Candle In The Wind"
• Elton John - "One Day At A Time"
• Jude - "End Of My Rainbow"
  
• Kubla Kahn - "Adidas"
• Chris Koza - "Look Left Look Right"
• Chantal Kreviazuk - "Far Away"
  
• John Lennon - "Crippled Inside"
  
• Julian Lennon - "Jesse"
• Sondre Lerche - "On The Tower"
• Lincoln - "Unhappy"
  
• Lisa Loeb - "How"
• Love And Rockets - "No Words No More"
  
• Kenny Loggins - "Footloose"
• Loretta Lynn - "Portland Oregon"
• Lucious Jackson - "Stardust"
• Aimee Mann - "Driving Sideways"
• Aimee Mann - "Little Bombs"
• Aimee Mann - "Nightmare Girl"
• Erin McKeown - "Cosmopolitians"
  
• Mighty Mighty Bosstones - "Another Drinkin' Song"
• Ronnie Milsap - "Why Can't I"
• Kylie Minogue - "Love Affair"
• Kylie Minogue - "Your Love"
• Modest Mouse - "Bury Me With It"
• Modest Mouse - "Ocean Breathes Salty"
• The Monkees - "Long Way Home"
  
• Alanis Morissette - "Ironic"
  
• Bob Mould - "I Am Vision, I Am Sound"
• Nas - "Carry On Tradition"
  
• N*E*R*D - "Breakout"
• Nirvana - "All Apologies"
  
• Old 97's - "Barrier Reef"
• Old 97's - "Bird In A Cage"
• Old 97's - "Designs On You"
• Old 97's - "Niteclub"
• The Outfield - "Somewhere In America '89"
• The Pierces - "Lights On"
• The Pierces - "Secret"
  
• Liz Phair - "Big Tall Man"
• Glen Phillips - "Blindsight"
• Matt Pond PA - "Brooklyn Stars"
• Positive K - "I Got A Man"
• The Pretenders - "Don't Get Me Wrong"
  
• Prince - "Dirty Mind"
• Prince - "Why You Wanna Treat Me So Bad?"
• Puffy AmiYumi - "Planet Tokyo"
  
• R.E.M. - "Find The River"
• Otis Redding - "Try A Little Tenderness"
• Ike Reilly - "Cash Is King"
  
• Smokey Robinson and the Miracles - "We've Come Too Far To End It Now"
• Rolling Stones - "Brown Sugar"
• The Rosebuds - "I Better Run"
  
• The Rosenbergs - "After All"
  
• David Ruffin - "I Miss You - Pt. 1"
• The Sewergrooves - "It's My Century"
• The Shins - "A Comet Appears"
• Sierra Leone 's Refugee All-Stars - "Living Like A Refugee"
  
• Siouxsie and the Banshees - "Happy House"
• Skee-Lo - "You Ain't Down"
  
• Smashing Pumpkins - "Saturnine"
• The Smiths - "Rubber Ring"
  
• Soul Coughing - "4 Out Of 5"
• Soul Coughing - "Down To This"
• Spin Doctors - "You Let Your Heart Go Too Fast"
  
• Spymob - "John Madden"
• Spymob - "Thinking Of Someone Else"
  
• Squeeze - "Heaven"
• Squeeze - "King George Street"
• The Subdudes - "Laughing At Birds"
• Matthew Sweet - "A Day In The Life Of A Tree"
  
• Matthew Sweet - "Everything Changes"
  
• Talking Heads - "Artists Only" (Live Version)
• James Taylor - "Native Son"
  
• They Might Be Giants - "The Guitar (The Lion Sleeps Tonight)"
  
• Travis - "Sing"
• Trashcan Sinatras - "Weightlifting" (Acoustic Version)
  
• A Tribe Called Quest - "1nce Again"
• A Tribe Called Quest - "Mr. Incognito"
• Shania Twain - "She's Not Just A Pretty Face"
• U2 - "Pride (In The Name Of Love)"
• John Vanderslice - "Angela"
• Valaria - "Rhythm Of The Night"
• Weezer - "O Girlfriend"
• Bill Withers - "Use Me"
  
• Wilco - "I Thought I Held You"
  
• Wilco - "Panthers"
• Wilco - "War On War"
• XTC - "Life Begins At The Hop"
• XTC - "Miniature Sun"
  
• XTC - "Sacrifical Bonfire"
• Elliot Yamin - "Take My Breath Away"

About the blog title

Here are the ten songs whose running times I averaged to reach the magic number of 3:49!

The Beatles - The Ballad Of John And Yoko (3:00)
Beach Boys - Don't Worry Baby (2:51)
Neil Diamond - The Boat That I Row (2:40)
Jay-Z - 99 Problems (3:54)
Elton John - Your Song (4:01)
Elvis Presley - Suspicious Minds (4:34)
Smokey Robinson And The Miracles - Tears Of A Clown (3:03)
Simon & Garfunkel - America (3:35)
Talking Heads - This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody) (4:56)
Toto - Africa (4:19)

Top 15 "We're Through!" Songs

15. Dandy Warhols - The Last High (from Welcome To The Monkey House)
14. Annie Lennox - Why (from Diva)
13. John Lennon - How Do You Sleep? (from Imagine)
12. XTC - Your Dictionary (from Apple Venus, Vol.1)
11. The Honeydogs - Over You (from Everything I Bet You)
10. Sinead O'Connor - Nothing Compares 2 U (from I Do Not Want What I Haven't Got)
9. Ben Folds Five - Song For The Dumped (from Whatever And Ever, Amen)
8. The Shins - Gone For Good (from Chutes Too Narrow)
7. Rhett Miller - Come Around (from The Instigator)
6. Paul Simon - Train In The Distance (from Hearts And Bones)
5. Fleetwood Mac - Go Your Own Way (from Rumours)
4. Kelly Clarkson - Since U Been Gone (from Breakaway)
3. Fiona Apple - Limp (from When The Pawn...)
2. Aimee Mann - Believed You Were Lucky (from Everything's Different Now)
1. Alanis Morissette - You Oughta Know (from Jagged Little Pill)

Top 5 Automotive Love Songs

5. Jimmy Eat World - Night Drive (from Futures)
4. Scissor Sisters - Lovers In The Backseat (from self-titled)
3. Billy Joel - Keepin' The Faith (from An Innocent Man)
2. Death Cab For Cutie - We Looked Like Giants (from Transatlanticism)
1. Meat Loaf - Paradise By The Dashboard Light (from Bat Out Of Hell)

Top 5 Side One, Track Ones

5. Wilco - I Am Trying To Break Your Heart (from Yankee Hotel Foxtrot)
4. Prince - Let's Go Crazy (from Purple Rain)
3. Elton John - Funeral For A Friend (Love Lies Bleeding) (from Goodbye Yellow Brick Road)
2. Beach Boys - Wouldn't It Be Nice (from Pet Sounds)
1. Michael Jackson - Wanna Be Starting Something (from Thriller)

Top 10 Songs About Self-Gratification

10. Depeche Mode - Never Let Me Down Again (from Music For The Masses)
9. Dannii Minogue - Vibe On (from Neon Nights)
8. Britney Spears - Touch Of My Hand (from In The Zone)
7. Tweet - Oops (Oh My) (from Southern Hummingbird)
6. The Vapors - Turning Japanese (from New Clear Days)
5. The Who - Pictures Of Lily (from Magic Bus)
4. Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself (from self-titled)
3. Queen - You're My Best Friend (from Night At The Opera)
2. Cyndi Lauper - She Bop (from She's So Unusual)
1. DiVinyls - I Touch Myself (from self-titled)

Top 10 Songs About Stretching The Truth

10. Gram Parsons - How Much I've Lied
9. James Taylor - I Was Only Telling A Lie (from JT)
7. Huey Lewis & The News - Some Of My Lies Are True (from self-titled)
6. Thompson Twins - Lies (from Quick Step & Side Kicks)
5. Toad The Wet Sprocket - Liars Everywhere (from Pale)
4. Chris Issak - Lie To Me (from self-titled)
3. Big Star - Don't Lie To Me (from #1 Record)
3. They Might Be Giants - Fibber Island (from No!)
2. Fleetwood Mac - Little Lies (from Tango In The Night)
1. The Posies - Everybody Is A Fucking Liar (from Amazing Disgrace)

Top 11 Songs About Gender or Sexuality Confusion

11. Aerosmith - Dude (Looks Like A Lady) (from Permanent Vacation)
10. Maniac Street Preachers - Born A Girl (from This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours)
9. The Who - I'm A Boy (from Live At Leeds)
8. White Town - Your Woman (from Women In Technology)
7. Counting Crows - I Wish I Was A Girl (from This Desert Life)
6. Louden Wainwright III - I Wish I Was A Lesbian (from Grown Man)
5. Garbage - Androgony (from Beautifulgarbage)
4. The Replacements - Anadrogynous (from Let It Be)
3. The Kinks - Lola (from Lola Versus Powerman)
2. Dukes Of The Stratosphear - Have You Seen Jackie? (from Psonic Psunspot)
1. Prince - If I Was Your Girlfriend (from Sign O' The Times)

Top 10 Love Songs

10. The Roots (feat.Erykah Badu) - You Got Me (from Things Fall Apart)
9. Smashing Pumpkins - Luna (from Siamese Dream)
8. XTC - I'd Like That (from Apple Venus, Vol.1)
7. Lionel Richie - You Are (from Lionel Richie)
6. The Temptations - The Way You Do The Things You Do (from The Ultimate Collection)
5. Ella Fitzgerald - You're The Top (from The Cole Porter Songbook, Vol.2)
4. James Taylor - Your Smiling Face (from JT)
3. The Beach Boys - God Only Knows (from Pet Sounds)
2. Ben Folds - The Luckiest (from Rockin' The Suburbs)
1. Elton John - Your Song (from Elton John)

Top 5 Anti-Love Songs

Don't put these on a mix for someone you actually like, unless you are trying reverse psychology.

5. Beach Boys - Wouldn't It Be Nice (from Pet Sounds)
4. Wallflowers - If You Never Got Sick (from Red Letter Days)
3. Al Green - Let's Get Married (from Livin' For You)
2. Dismemberment Plan - Ellen And Ben (from Change)
1. Joe Jackson - Be My Number Two (from Body And Soul)

Top 5 Soundtracks

This isn't counting soundtracks of original material (i.e. songs written for and performed in the movie). If I were to do that list, number one would easily be The Muppet Movie.

5. O Brother Where Art Thou?
4. Pulp Fiction
3. Rushmore
2. Ghostbusters II
1. Say Anything